Loss

It's been done. The service, the endless paperwork, all the friends and family trying to help and support me

He is gone. I am alone.

We had talked about this, we knew what each of us wanted. I was older and I was supremely sure I would be the first one to go.

I sit on our bed, my bed now. It is huge, it never was before. A wide gulf empty. I need to move. I can't sit here.


It crashes over me again. He's gone. I want it to be a dream. I want him.

Hanging on the post his work shirt. I press it to my face. He is here. I can smell his aftershave, his warmth, his scent.

The tears begin again.